Tuesday, February 26, 2008

Entertainment Lawyer 01/01
#1 This divorced A list rock star God and father, takes his invincibility to a whole other level when he is self medicating. When he does, his guns come out and his clothes come off. Recently he and his "doctor" were naked except for machine guns and night vision glasses when the police found them. Neighbors in his LA community had called police to report machine gun fire and loud screaming and yelling. When the cops showed up they found our rock star and his "doctor" in the above stated positions. Sure they had been firing away, and should have gone to jail. Instead the police asked about the guns and asked for autographs. Eddie Van Halen 98%

#2 This lead singer from one of the greatest bands of all time has always been known as a ladies man. He was, but no longer. Now he much prefers the company of men. As in, never goes out with women anymore despite what he publicly professes. David Lee Roth 98%

#3This hot blooded female singer got on an elevator at a hotel in LA with about three other people. She immediately took up a position in front of the mirror in the elevator. On the next two floors the elevator stopped, letting more people on. When the added people started blocking her own view of herself on the elevator, she told them to please move out of the way. This forced the people on the elevator to all squeeze together uncomfortably. Our singer then continued to model and pose in front of the mirror all the way to her floor. Not quite Eva Mendes strutting around a Starbucks, but close. Shakira 98%

#4What Presidential candidate is sleeping with an aide? Hilary Clinton 98%

#5This singer/fighter didn't let a date stand in the way of him hitting on any woman he saw at last night's CMA show. Did it in front of her, without her, and it all did no good. His bored looking date still went home with him at the end of the night. Kid Rock 98%

#6 This blonde, female singer was hit on Sunday night by another woman. When the singer realized what was going on, she replied, "Ewwww. That's sick." How about that for some tolerance huh? Jessica Simpson 98%

#7 On a day when you were being nice and maybe just had some great loving, you might consider this film actress to be B list. She used to be for sure. Now, she doesn't do much of anything except show up where the beautiful people are and every once in awhile make a fool of herself. Definitely only with beautiful people though. At a party the other night, she was overheard giving a lengthy dissertation on why she doesn't have any ugly friends and how if you do, people will think less of you, and that you should only surround yourself with the best which means rich guys, quality clothes, and no ugly friends. "What happens if someone becomes ugly after they are her friend?"

"I never speak to them again, unless of course they are rich or can help me in some way. But it better be a very big help. Of course they aren't my friends then, just a business partner." Tara Reid 98%

#8 This pregnant singer decided to spend the night at a hotel with her man. She must have really enjoyed what they were doing because the management called twice to let her know that the other guests were complaining about how loud in bed she was. Christina Aguilera 98%

#9 From AP-This jet set actor/actress B list couple took a few minutes out for themselves at a party the other night. The couple spent most of the night arguing about what the wife was wearing, and made up by having a quickie in the restroom. Probably would have got away with no one noticing, except that she was rather vocal and has a very interesting pet name for her husband. Jennifer Connelly & Paul Bettany 98%

#10 This celebutard was talking smack at a party about a guest who is a blinged out top male singer/producer. Word got to the singer and he made sure that whenever our celebutard started hitting on a woman, the singer would involve himself into the conversation and get the woman to come with him. Even though he was getting paid to be at the party, our celebutard left early and left pissed. Kevin Federline & Kanye West 98%

No comments: